• tabular@lemmy.world
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    22 days ago

    Perhaps they were not suggesting deep end transphobia (hate) but just low end aversion? You should have the right to not date a trans person, or a different color person, but we could ask would it be better if none of us cared about that?

    If we look for the source of people’s choices one may find the answer to also be biology, with the rest of enviroment. The conventional wisdom to blame people for their choices is not supported by evidence. Even the most evil people in history didn’t choose to have a psychopathic personality, or choose their bad parents, or their hateful beliefs.

    • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
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      22 days ago

      Your second paragraph is just the point I am trying to make no? People can’t choose who they love or are attracted (or not attracted) to.

      So I am uncomfortable with the suggestion that any cis person who doesnt want to date a trans person should set up a disclaimer on their profile, with the afterthought insinuating that they shouldn’t have an issue with that unless they are secretly transphobic, or trans averse as you put it.

      Personally I (as a straight cis dude) am very supportive of equal rights for non straight people, and think they are a beautiful facet of mankind. I would be fully supporting most of their causes, but that doesnt mean I am suddenly attracted to, broadly speaking, not cis women. I can’t change that, or make an exception for someone, that’s simply not how I was wired. Would you consider that trans averse? Honest question.

      • tabular@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        I’m bi and would date trans people so it’s difficult to relate. I wouldn’t write “only interested in (for example) white people” on a profile because it may imply racism, even though there may be no hate and the intention would be to just save both people’s time.

        I use the word aversion to make a distinction between other people who hate. Someone who feels sick seeing a same-sex kiss is having an aversion to homosexuality but that doesn’t mean they hate, or want to kill and could be an ally in all ways. So yes, I would say not wanting to date trans people falls into a category of aversion by my definition, but that’s my brain trying to sort things. I don’t mean anything bad by it.